Conversation with my Mother
Conversation With My Mother:
My Mother: What’s the matter.
Me: Oh, nothing. I just have a new worry.
My Mother: What’s that, darling.
Me: This morning, I awoke with sore fingers and purple nails.
My Mother: Ok. Did you call your doctor?
Me: Yes. She said it was nothing to worry about. Just another pregnancy symptom.
My Mother: Well, then what are you worried for?
Me: Because how can I be sure she’s right.
My Mother: You don’t miss a beat.
Me: Well, I just want to make sure the baby is ok.
My Mother: The baby is ok. This is what I want you to do.
Me: What.
My Mother: Get some squishy balls.
Me: Squishy balls?
My Mother: If you squish some balls around in your hands it will help with circulation. That’s all that’s going on, Jess. Your body is not used to all that extra weight. I was the same way. I’m not sure what they’re called, but just look up squishy balls. I’m sure you’ll find something.
Me: I’m sure I will find more than I care to about squishy balls
My Mother: Well, then mix some flour and water together and squish that.
Me: I would never do that.
My Mother: Then fine. Don’t do that. Don’t do a goddamn thing.
Me: I won’t.
My Mother: Good. Guess what I found on the sidewalk this morning?
Me: A dollar bill?
My Mother: I would never go down for a dollar. I wouldn’t go down for anything less than 25.
Me: Well what was it, then?
My Mother: Two bamboo shades. I had just been thinking how I wanted to hang two bamboo shades outside so I could sit in my rocking chair and not get blasted by the sun, and there they were, just waiting for me.
Me: Well, that’s funny.
My Mother: It isn’t funny. It was put there by my guardian angels.
Me: Well, that’s beautiful, Mother.
My Mother: I knew you would like that.
Me: I do.
My Mother: The world is here to give you what you’re looking for, darling. Stop looking for problems, and go find some squishy balls.
Me: Thank you, Mother.